Wednesday, September 2, 2015

It's what I believe... on gay marriage.

In the past few months I have had to think about my "stance" on the subject of whether or not gay couples should be allowed to marry in a church, and/or allowed to be married by an ordained person of a church. 

Having to think now?  Why?    Yes.  It's become an issue at MY church, and I think since the Supreme Court granted all 50 states the right to same sex marriage,  it's probably an issue in many churches and houses of worship all across America.

I personally had not thought about it too much earlier, because I have always been of the mindset that whatever people do in and for love is a good thing.  If it's a mutual decision, who am I to say no?  I have always believed that being gay is not an option.  It's not a choice. It's not a fad.  Gay men and lesbian women are born with genetic attraction to their same sex.  Most gays come to some understanding of their sexuality by the time of puberty, and by that age, they already know they will have a hard road to travel in today's society.  So, it's not a "cause" to take up.

Everyone - EVERYONE - wants love.  Everyone wants to be accepted by somebody.   The desire to marry and make a family is a natural part of existing for most,  although it's reached at different times and ages.   But, yes, I think given an option of being alone, or in love with someone and sharing life together, most will prefer to be with someone.

So. Okay.  That's what I think...

BUT, now let's think about what God "might" think about it.  I say "might" because NONE of us are God, and really, none of us know for certain what God thinks about homosexuality.   I can hear some of you getting all riled up right about now.  So, hear me out.

I have gone to Sunday School as a kid, and have gone to church all my adulthood. The past 12 or so years I have gone to a weekly Bible Study in a small group setting.  I have read much of the Bible, and I have had wonderful opportunities to discuss the great book.  I don't know if you have noticed, but the Bible is written in some hard to understand language and mysterious ways... Jesus used lots of parables (stories), some different prophets came with messages, and then the disciples wrote "with divine guidance"...   all giving us "God's Word."   I do not doubt that.  

But, still, I have a hard time always being clear on what God wants for us.   EXCEPT...  and this is a BIG thing.....  God makes it clear that there are 10 Commandments (instructions for us to stay on the right path and please him), and, most of all He says "Love each other as I have loved you."

I think God knows we humans can't get too complicated.  10 rules and one major way to live out life.  We can handle that. (Or can we?)       Did you notice?  The ten commandments do not say anything in them about limiting our love, and about judging who can love each other and who can't.

So, back to the main debate at our church and other churches, can a gay marriage take place there...and by an ordained pastor?   Well, what is a church wedding?    It's about two people coming before God by choice, in His special home with community around, declaring and vowing to love each other, to be true to each other, in sickness and in health, etc.  I think you have heard it before.   Bible passages are read.  Prayers are offered up to God for the couple.   Usually, at the end of Christian ceremonies, the pastor then gives a benediction asking the Lord to bless the union, and to let His light shine upon their faces.  To give thee peace.

How can any of that be wrong?  

 I suppose I can not leave off mentioning something about the physical part of a gay marriage.  Some have issues with that.   Like I said before being gay is not a choice, so it's not kinky, or odd.  For a gay person.    I think enough is said about that.   Also, yes it takes a man and a woman to make a baby.  That is how God created us.  But, have you noticed there are a lot of babies looking for some good loving parents?

I think about how many heterosexual marriages and families would probably do better with God in the equation.  That marriage is tough, and having God, having Jesus and his example of love - especially the love for others who are poor, downtrodden, different, needy - it is all good.  It's all positive.

Positive.  Here is my last thought about it.   When people say "no you can't" they sound so  judgmental, and they sound very negative.  Now, there is a time/need for rules and punishments - when people go against the civil laws of the land, or when they hurt or kill others.  We need order in society.   But, when it comes to accepting gay marriage there is nothing hurtful, certainly not murderous - and now it is the law of our land.

I am a Christian.  I love my God. I do my best to love my neighbor.  If any person, gay or straight, can keep and respect the civil laws of this land, then I believe they have every right to stand before God and ask for His blessing.

So now - when someone asks me why I believe what I do - I can say "read my blog post from September 2, 2015."   


  1. Amen, I will leave all judgement of others to God... We are all sinners and by Grace I have found Him through his son. We are all souls with bodies... the soul and heart is what matters.

  2. I am so glad I jumped to this post from visiting your hodgepodge. My daughter gets married next month, to the love of her life - another woman. It won't be in a church but the union will be recognised as a marriage. I'm glad that they are able to live their lives so freely and feel sorry for those who are still persecuted or risk imprisonment for being open about their beliefs. It's often difficult to reconcile the teachings of the Church with the world as it is today. We're told so many things are bad and we shouldn't do them. I like to think that our knowledge comes from God but it's how we use that knowledge that's important.

  3. Well written dear, I wish others were as universally loving and kind as you are! I hope it gives others something to really think about... All I /we can do is keep fighting for equality and compassion for all human beings, that's what Jesus would do.
    Keep up the great work,
    Gale Meyer =)