Monday morning quarterbacking

Hi everyone!   I haven't posted on my blog for a few weeks. 

Why?

Well, I have been feeling a bit afraid, and a bit fed up, and just a bit annoyed with all the stuff out there.  And, I know just by finally posting I will probably upset someone.   I constantly struggle with what to say, how much to say, and IF I should say anything.

I started my blog years ago for a couple of reasons. I wanted to use the outlet as a way to express myself. I wanted to work on my writing skills (or try to get some! lol) I wanted to put down my thoughts so that my daughters can see me as a whole person, not just mom.  (Although being mom has been my greatest joy! )

Sometimes I have used the blog to post personal stories. Sometimes I have given a review.   I have used it to honor a family member or friend.  Sometimes I have used it as my soapbox to express my opinion on politics, and the direction of the country.  Sometimes I have tried to open up about being a Christian.  Everyone has their own story.  I'm not extra-ordinary.  But, I am unique - and I find my blog as a place of therapy.  A place to put down my thoughts.   A place for some 'Monday morning quarterbacking."

So, here I go...

*  Although it's been a mild, and really lovely January and February, I still struggle during these months.  It is still a time of 'waiting.'   I wait for spring when it is safe to plant. I wait for events that are on the calendar a bit later in the year.  And, this year I wait for a buyer for our Willbrook home.  I wait and wonder what to do. 

*  I prepare for Lent.  Ash Wednesday is in two days. Will I give up something - or add something to my life?  And why?  I need to decide. 

* I struggle with 'not doing enough'...  in just about everything. 

*  I miss people.  But I also love being alone.

*  I turned a new decade two months ago.  In reality, I know I am blessed to reach the age. I plan/pray on having many, many more years ahead.  But,  it's been a tough acceptance.   I know it sounds shallow to say it.  But, growing old is tough. I have always considered myself just naturally in good health, lucky to have good genes, and in having an understanding of how to keep it together.   But, lately, I realize it is not easy anymore.  

*  Mondays are reflective!  ha!!

* I have made 'kindness' my mantra.  Every since the song "Stay Humble and Kind" came out and touched me so, I have purposely tried to live my life being kind.  I have tried to share a smile, or lend a hand - equally.  I post uplifting phrases about kindness.  I even wear a "Kindness" My Intent bracelet.   I truly believe being kind can change the world. 

*  I love being home, and in my beautiful spot on this earth.  So many of my friends travel and I sometimes feel that I should also... I see the pictures and I hear the stories.   But, I don't have an aching desire to pack a bag and leave home.

* I admit I still don't 'get' the other political side.  My brain just can't figure them out.  But, I realize they feel the same way about me and others that are 'like minded' with me.  I really don't think people can be changed in their thoughts.  And, I really think we can not come together unless we teach our children the art of compromise.   But, we don't. We teach winning, and children mirror the adults in their lives.  We don't set a very good example.

*  Thank you God for music!  

*  I have never been a person who needs the finer things in life.  Name brands don't mean anything to me (except higher prices), and I worry about leaving behind too much stuff.  I want 'reliable' and I want 'convenience'... yes.  But, I don't want to collect, or put my joy into inanimate objects. 

*  I love to read but I get really annoyed with myself because I start to doze while reading after about a half hour.  It has nothing to do with the book!   It can be an amazing story.  And amazing author.   Does it have to do with age?  Probably.

* Well, one good thing about aging: I have learned to stop and smell the roses.  I appreciate nature.  When I was young I concerned myself with other 'stuff' and never gave myself time to appreciate the beauty of the world. Perhaps it was where I was living too.  I love this place here.

*  I like social media.  I don't deny it.  I like Facebook -and the way to keep in touch on-line, and to share pictures.  I do not fear it as some do.  I love texting too and wonder how different my connection with my own parents would have been with it.  When I went off to college I only spoke with my parents on the telephone once a week.  I became self-reliant (actually I always have been) but we never got to share 'moments' or funny things... or just a quick hello.   I am so blessed to have it with my daughters.  Thank you technology!!

* As I type this I have a pug on my lap and one on the back of the sofa by my shoulder.  Pets are the best! 

* I will never ever understand why people who own guns can't see the big picture and won't personally give up their own gun for a safer society for us all.  I feel there is too much "me" in this world...and not enough "we."   Anytime a child is killed by a hunting gun, or an unattended pistol, or by someone who has been careless - or by an 'accident' - my heart breaks.    Why are people so selfish?

So, do I sit back and stay quiet?  Or do I blog?  Or, do I do more?   Do I become an activist without fear?  

*  Monday mornings are a time to regroup. To plan.  It's a chance for a start fresh...to start a new week.  I will make a list of things to do today in a minute - and I will check my calendar for the next days coming.   Expectations?  Appointments?  Lenten choices?    Exercise? 

Let's get this week going!!